Sasuke has a Bizarre Moment
by Dyeh
Summary: Sasuke has a gay moment, or in other words, he tries to convince himself that he really isn’t gay. Yaoi and slight incest implications. Title changed correct one inside. R


Summary  
Sasuke has a gay moment, or rather, he attempts to convince himself that he is actually _straight_. Unfortunately, he's not, but it's amusing to think what he would do to try and convince himself...

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**Disclaimer: If I owned Naruto, Sasuke and Neji would get married o.O;**

Tonight, it seemed that I had some what of a death wish. Yes, that's right, I'm expecting some... sort... of... flame... from somebody, at least. I mean, there is a bazillion Sasuke lovers out there, right? ... In any case, if you haven't noticed, I like the idea of a gay Sasuke. Yeah, we all know he's gay anyway... But, wait, that's not the point.

The correct title for this fanfiction is; "Sasuke has a Gay Moment", but I wasn't sure if Fanfiction would take it down or not, so I got rid of the gay bit. The original titles better, so I'm just going to use that n.n

Anyways, I wrote this short one shot (where all the characters are out of character - it's for humour people!), for my friend Chantelle. Enjoy! (and don't forget to review)

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**Sasuke has a Gay Moment.  
**_Written for Chantelle._

Sasuke paused, flicking his black bangs away from his face, perched on his window sill, ignoring the flock of girls that were trying to get a decent peak at his crotch by standing underneath, and as such were cursing the window sill that was in their way.

He yawned, stretched, and made his way down to the ground by bounding back and forth from other peoples window sills (stealing a pie that was cooling while he was at it.)

Taking a chunk out of the pie that he'd stolen, Sasuke shoved it in his mouth, walking absentmindedly through the town square. As per usual, Konoha was full of life. There were shop keepers calling out their latest prices, teenagers being scolded for shoplifting, butchers beheading chickens in front of small children, and just general living. Unfortunately, Sasuke attracted _a lot _of attention. (Probably due to the piece of toilet paper on his shoe that appeared rather randomly with no warning.)

"Look, isn't that the Uchiha?"

"Wow… the only survivor…"

"Ha-ha-ha! Look! He's got toilet paper on his shoe!"

"Isn't that Mrs Mac's pie?"

"LIVE CHICKENS FOR SALE!"

Well, most of those comments were directed at Sasuke in any case, but there was one whispered between a group of shoppers that really troubled him.

"Hey, don't you find it strange?" One asked.

"Find what strange?" Another queried.

"He could have any girl he wanted in the entire village, and yet he doesn't want any of them. Do you suppose he's gay?"

The group pondered momentarily, hardly noticing the fact that Sasuke had stopped with a rather devastated look written all over his face.

"WOW! Do you think I have a chance?" The third of the group squealed after the prolonged silence. His companions gave him a rather strange look.

Needless to say, Sasuke was out of there like wild fire.

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The tree's that surrounded Konoha Village were lush and green, full of fruit, nuts, squirrels, birds, cats, and well, just about everything. The sun hardly filtered through the squeezed tree tops, all in all, it was a very serene feeling… or it would have bee; if a very pissed off Sasuke wasn't storming down a narrow path to what he hoped was an empty training ground to kick some serious manakin ass.

"How _dare_ they call me gay!" He muttered darkly to himself, his hands becoming fists of anger and rage. He swung around, punching the nearest tree. Rubbing his now stinging fist, he continued on his way, beginning an in depth conversation with his mind. "I'm _not_ gay!"

_Then why don't you date any girls?_

"Because they're all idiots."

_You and I both know that's not true. Sakura isn't an idiot._

"I mean a different kind of idiocy!"

_You haven't even looked at a girl in that way… boys however…_

"Look! That girl over there is pretty good looking!"

_Sasuke, that's a tree._

So, this conversation continued until Sasuke finally got the training ground – only to find Neji pounding the shit out of the manakin that he was supposed to be killing.

Neji paused, turning to look at where Sasuke stood. He tilted his head. "Sasuke…?"

"You're in my spot."

"You don't have to speak so harshly." Neji pointed out quite bluntly, "and it seems fate has a different plan for you, considering I was here first." Stretching, Neji began to stroll in the direction of the Uchiha. "I'm done anyway."

That was when Sasuke's mind started thinking… things.

_Neji has a good body doesn't he? Plus, he has long hair. And long hair is dreamy. You thought so ever since you saw Itachi, but noooooo, that's incest, isn't it? You and your stupid morals. But, Neji's _not_ family, is he? And he's a _guy

Before he knew it, Neji had stopped directly in front of where Sasuke was. Silently, he reached out his hand, further, further, toward Sasuke…

_Oh yeah! Man! He's hitting on me!_

"What are you…"

Neji, surprisingly, smiled. "You had a leaf in your hair." He handed the small green object to Sasuke, "The training grounds all yours."

And, as Neji left, Sasuke whispered to himself quietly; "He is kind'a cute…"


End file.
